| “ | That is all because in the reality of this human world, it is impossible for every person to be happy. In the shadow of happiness, there is cruelty. There is always a balance between the positives and negatives. That's what the Holy Corpse is! For argument's sake, think of what'd happen were it handed over to some rule-flaunting low-life bastard of the other side of the world. He would only think of using it for things he wants, low-life things. One can only imagine what deplorable events would then be store for the future of this country... That is one scenario which I must prevent. As President, it is my sworn duty! In this world, to guarantee the safety of the people of my country. That is what it all comes down to! | „ |
| ~ Funny Valentine |
| “ | Dojyaaa~~n! | „ |
| ~ Funny Valentine's catchphrase |
| “ | Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap. | „ |
| ~ Funny Valentine calling his Stand |
| “ | Dojyaaa~~n! | „ |
| ~ Funny Valentine's catchphrase |
| “ | Power, Glory, Happiness, Culture, Law, Money, Food, The hearts of the people! I HAVE TAKEN THE FIRST NAPKIN! | „ |
| ~ Funny Valentine upon obtaining Love Train |
| “ | My heart and actions are utterly unclouded! They are all those of 'Justice'! | „ |
| ~ Funny Valentine's last words |
| “ | Dojyaaa~~n! | „ |
| ~ Funny Valentine's catchphrase |
Summary []
Funny Valentine is the main villain of JoJo's Bizarre Adventure Part 7: Steel Ball Run. He is extremely patriotic because of how he heard about how his father held onto the Napkin that had his name on it even while being tortured. He was a soldier that fought in the American Civil War but was left for dead in a desert when he found the Heart of Jesus which merged with him and gave him a Stand, Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap (Shortened to D4C). After he returned home, he entered the world of politics and eventually became the President of the USA, however, he knew he could only be president for so long so he created the Steel Ball Run race as a way to collect the Corpse Parts and hide them in America so that it would make America the happiest country on the planet.
Powers and Stats []
Tier: 9-B | High 7-C | High 7-C, At least Low 7-B with Hax
Name: Funny Valentine
Origin: JoJo's Bizarre Adventure Part 7: Steel Ball Run
Gender: Male
Age: 48
Classification: 23rd President of the United States of America, Stand User
Powers and Abilities:
Superhuman Physical Characteristics, Weapon Mastery (Is an expert at using a revolver to the point of hitting Axl Ro's neck and intentionally missing all of his vitals while remaining hidden), Social Influencing (Is an extremely charismatic leader who is able to persuade people into working for him or at the very least not fighting against him, Has an approval rating of ninty-one percent), Extrasensory Perception (As a Stand User, Funny Valentine is able to see Stands which are invisible to non-Stand Users and ghosts), Aura, Summoning (Can summon his Stands, Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap), Indomitable Will (Only those with incredible fighting spirits are able to develop and use a Stand), Telepathy (Stand Users can communicate telepathically through their Stands), Instinctive Reactions (Most Stands will instinctively activate to protect their User even if the User doesn't want them to), Healing, Biological Manipulation (Has his own version of Cream Starter which is able to shoot out flesh to heal others)
Weather Manipulation (Can create a massive storm), Spatial Manipulation, Teleportation (With the Corpse Parts, Funny Valentine can teleport people around him by bending space), Clairvoyance (Funny Valentine can use the eyes of the Saint's Corpse to see what he wishes to see), Resistance to Transmutation, Mind Control and Disease Manipulation (With the Corpse Parts, Funny Valentine becomes immune to the effects of Scary Monsters)
Superhuman Physical Characteristics, Immortality (Type 6, Funny Valentine can transfer his Stand and his memories to an alternate version of himself if he is lethally injured), Dimensional Travel (By pressing himself between two objects he can travel to alternative universes), BFR (He can trap people and attacks in alternative universes), Summoning (Can summon alternative universe versions of himself and any potential allies he finds in the other universe), Soul Manipulation, Non-Physical Interaction (Stands are made up of their user's soul and can damage and destroy other Stands), Invisibility, Intangibility (Stands are invisible to Non-Stand users and are intangible to any Non-Stand)
All previous abilities, Fusionism (Upon activation, Love Train fuses objects together in order to stop and kill anyone who wishes to harm Funny Valentine), Damage Transferral (Any minor attack that D4C lands can be redirected to somewhere else on the opponent's body), Probability Manipulation (Can attract good luck and send bad luck away from him), Limited BFR, Transmutation (Any attack that hits the Dimensional Barrier will be annhilated and transformed into negative bad luck before being sent somewhere else in the world), Forcefield Creation, Attack Reflection (Can create a wall of light that reflects any attack that hits the wall of light to somewhere else on the planet), Shapeshifting (Funny Valentine can transform into a flat object), Flight (With Love Train, Funny Valentine is able to walk through the air around him to reach an opponent)
Attack Potency: Wall Level (Is comparable to Gyro Zeppeli, Broke a wooden door in half with a kick) | Large Town Level (Is comparable in strength to The World, Fought on par with Diego Brando) Can negate durability by creating a paradox | Large Town Level (Is as strong as it was before) Can negate durability by redirecting attacks, At least Small City Level with Hax (Just the Spine of the Holy Corpse created a storm that covered Kansas)
Speed: Normal Human Speed with MFTL reactions (Has reacted to attacks from Johnny Joestar and Gyro Zeppeli) | MFTL (Fought on par with Diego Brando) | MFTL (Is as fast as it was before)
Lifting Strength: Peak Human | Superhuman
Striking Strength: Wall Level | Large Town Level | Large Town Level
Durability: Large Town Level (Survived multiple powerful attacks from Gyro Zeppeli) | Large Town Level (Survived blows from Diego Brando) | Large Town Level (Is as durable as it was before)
Stamina: Superhuman (Funny Valentine continued fighting after being stabbed, shot, having his limbs almost sliced off, being aged heavily and having every cell in his body spinning until they are all destroyed)
Range: Standard melee range, Extended melee range to Several metres with D4C, Several metres to Tens of metres with Revolvers, Planetary with Love Trains' Dimensional Barrier
Standard Equipment: Revolvers, American Flag
- The Saint's Corpse: Funny Valentine has access to the Saint's Corpse which is the corpse of Jesus Christ. The Saint's Corpse naturally gives someone a Stand when fused into someone's body and also gives the person some resistance to an opponent's Stand ability. While not fused into someone, Funny Valentine can use the corpse parts to view any event he wishes to by using the eyes and can teleport by warping space and create a massive storm. After gaining every part of the Saint's Corpse, it fused with Lucy and gave Funny Valentine the ability of Love Train.
- Cream Starter: After travelling to another universe, Funny Valentine stole Hot Pants' Stand, Cream Starter from her as a bargaining chip to use against Johnny. Cream Starter can be used to spray flesh out of it in order to heal others.
Intelligence: Genius (Became the President of the United States, has fought successfully in the American Civil War, found where all of the Corpse Parts and how to gather them)
Weaknesses: There is only one D4C in the multiverse so if there is no Funny Valentines left in the universe then D4C will die, Any other Funny Valentine that is brought to help the main Valentine won't have D4C they will only fight with guns, Any damage dealt to D4C will also be dealt to Funny Valentine, If D4C is destroyed then Funny Valentine will die too
Notable Attacks/Techniques:
- Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap: Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap (Often shortened to D4C) is a Close-Range Humanoid Stand. Its main ability is to travel between alternative universes, with this ability it can bring alternative universe versions of Funny Valentine, however, there is only one D4C so the other Valentine can only use guns. Funny Valentine can also trap people in an alternative universe and if they come in contact with their alternative universe counterpart than they will merge together and both be destroyed, Funny Valentine is the only one who is immune to this rule.
- Dimension Hopping: Whenever Funny Valentine is squashed between two objects, he is able to travel to a parallel universe. Funny Valentine can manually trigger this ability by using objects such as an American Flag, a body of water whether it be small amount such as pitcher of water or a large amount such as the ocean, this ability makes Funny Valentine immune to getting crushed if someone tries to force him against a surface then he will just appear on the opposite side of the person and even attacks such as being run over by a train or being hit by a large projectile cause him no harm. There are an infinite number of parallel universes that Funny Valentine is able to travel to. Aside from escaping from harm, Funny Valentine can travel to another universe to send harmful attacks to another universe, trapping someone half in between universes making them unable to move or gather allies to fight alongside him, whether it be another person or not universe's equivalent of him, however, there is only one D4C in the multiverse with the other Funny Valentines having to fight with guns. If someone has been brought into another universe by D4C, anyone can return them to their original universe by crushing them between two surfaces.
- Paradox: Whenever someone or something other than Funny Valentine encounters their alternative universe counterpart directly then both of them will be slowly pulled together before crumbling into merger sponges which collide with each other and are both destroyed, which is the universe making sure that two of the same person don't exist within the same universe. Funny Valentine is the only thing completely unaffected by this universe paradox.
- User Transferal: Whenever Funny Valentine is critically injured in battle, as long as he is able to find another Funny Valentine, he can transfer ownership of D4C and his memories with this new Funny Valentine going off to achieve their original mission. Because there are an infinite number of parallel universes, this makes it almost impossible to kill Funny Valentine without attacking him with an instant kill attack.
- D4C Love Train: D4C Love Train is a Close-Range Stand that evolved when Jesus granted Funny Valentine a part of its power. This power is transferred from the body of Lucy Steel who has all of the parts of the Saint's Corpse to Funny Valentine.
- Misfortune Redirection: D4C Love Train's main ability is to redirect luck itself, rejecting all bad luck away from Funny Valentine and attracting good luck towards him, leaving only bad luck for those around him.
- Dimensional Barrier: Love Train produces a dimensional barrier around Funny Valentine and D4C, this barrier protects Funny Valentine from all harm with any damage that hits the barrier will be annihilated and disappear with any negative luck getting redirected away from Funny Valentine and to somewhere else in the world and being inflicted onto some random person. The only thing that can bypass this Dimensional Barrier are attacks that have infinite power such as the Infinite Rotation that Johnny and Gyro used against Funny Valentine.
- Barrier Movement: Funny Valentine can use the Dimensional Barrier as a method of travel, allowing Funny Valentine to fly and to turn into a flat projection that can travel across the ground.
- Attack Reflection: Love Train has the ability to alter the placement of damage that he deals to an opponent, redirecting a small slash on the outside of a person's body down into a person's body into their heart.
- Negative Fusionism: Upon Love Train's activation, all nearby objects near an opponent will be attracted to them, latching into them and trapping them in place before the objects start to enter their body and kill them from the inside out.
- Environment Attraction: All objects in the environment are passively drawn to Lucy's location, such as trees, the grass and even the ocean itself. This is used by Funny Valentine by allowing him to use the ocean in order to easily transport himself to another universe by crushing himself between the waves.
Key: Funny Valentine | Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap | D4C Love Train